April 19th 2003

[lizwontcry]

So I went to see The Pianist tonight, basically because I didn't want to go home. More about that later.

But geez louise.. I felt like such an asshole watching that movie. Here I was, just having had fajitas and a margarita at Chuy's, fat and happy, driving my own little car around Austin, thinking I'm the shiznit, and then there's Adrien Brody, barely able to breath because he has absolutely nothing to eat, he's locked in this tiny little room all day with nothing to do but think about his life. It's not like he could have gotten up to watch a movie.

But I'm just weird like that.

Anyway. Tonight I went to Chuy's with Sarah and Jennifer. We had good times. I probably should have skipped the margarita, but what can you do sometimes. I was happy.. I had 2 people to have dinner with and that was just pretty awesome, yes indeed.

I told them my Nick Stahl story because I saw him in Maxim today. I know that being in Terminator 3 is going to make him a huge huge star. And for some reason that drives me crazy! I was 11 years old, for fuck's sake! Don't you think I can get over that sometime soon?

*shakes head*

I didn't want to go home because I'm a freak like that. I want Matt to think that I have some vibrant and active social life so he'll wonder what I'm doing and try to get up in my business. I know that's sad, but that's where I am in my life right now. Today I hung out at 2 different bookstores for almost 3 hours just because I didn't want to go home. Hopefully I'll look back and laugh at myself someday, but for now.. it makes me feel better to be gone. There's nothing to do here, anyway. It's all poo.

I would tell you all about the chick who totally got hit on at the bookstore today, but I'll save that for tomorrow. It's way past my bed time.

For now, here's a list of stuff I want to do tomorrow:

See a movie, go to the bookstore, get some sun if the weather is nice, call Alison and Ryan because they've been MIA in my life for too long, clean my apartment, clean out my car, do some reviews, maybe actually write a little bit of my story so I can get started on my writing career, go to the library, work out, take a walk and go to my new magical mystery spot, and and and..

there's only 24 hours tomorrow, right?

Anyway. I think I'm deleriously tired right now, so I'll shut up. Also, I decided that I'm going home next weekend, and if Matt doesn't talk to me between now and then, he's not going to know that, which means I won't see him because he won't know I'm there. That works, right?

I'm weird.

______
At this very moment, all is right in the world. I have no plans with anybody today, but it's cloudy, it's raining, and there's that lovely and refreshing rain smell in the air. I listened to my favorite radio show online this morning, and I just worked out, complete with the elliptical trainer and lifting weights and everything, and tonight I'm going to take myself on a date to the bookstore and a movie. It's good times, ya know?

I think I'm in such good spirits because I've decided to go home next weekend. I'll see my mommy, and maybe I'll hook it up old school style with Chris or Natalie or perhaps even Ryan, if I ever get the guts to call him like I said I would.

I just IMed Matt because I'm in a good mood and thought it would be a good idea. I am such a dork. Now we're discussing his zits.

I wanted to tell you guys about my bookstore experience yesterday. I was just sitting in my big chair and reading Maxim, and this total random guy comes up to the chick next to me and says, quite exuberantly, "Are you STUDYING?!" And they get in this big 10 minute discussion about life in general. You can tell this guy wants to get him some, and this chick isn't having it. Finally, they exchange the digits, but she has to warn him before giving him her number.. "I'm married, just so you know, but I'm new here and I really want some new friends!" Oh, the look on that guy's face. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

I'm documenting this experience because I've never seen anything like it! Do you guys ever get hit on at the bookstore? I wish I'd get hit on! But I don't think I have the proper hit upon look. I think I still have that "I'm desperate for friends and attention so stay away from me" look right now. At least that's better than the "I'm taken so you better fuck off" look that I had for so long. I need to work on the "I'm cool and casual and if you talk to me we'll have good times" look.

Matt and I are really having a lovely conversation. Sometimes it's nice to just talk to him about stupid stuff. I can appreciate that.

So, I need a job. I just thought you guys should know that.

I have seen a lot of movies lately. I have about $75 to last until the end of the month, but I will not let that interfere with my movie watching, oh no. Here's a list of the movies I've seen in the past 3 weeks:

The Hours, Anger Management, The Pianist, Bringing Down the House, The Pianist, Laurel Canyon, Phone Booth, Head of State, and yeah. Just a lot of movies. Movies make me happy. I really like sitting there in the dark for 2 hours with my popcorn and just getting absorbed into another world. It's good times.

My arms are doing that post-workout jittery thing where I can barely type, so I think I shall end this for now. But yay Saturday, yay rain, and yay cute civilized conversations.

Oh, and before I go.. have you guys heard this horrible song that's set up to Fur Elise, by Beethoven, but it's like this horrible song with these chicks singing "I can be what I want to be, if I work hard at it, blah blah blah." Ehehe. That song SUCKS ASS. I just wanted to document that.