lizwontcry | February 5th 2003

So tonight I decided it would be a good idea to drive to San Antonio for no good reason except to go to Barnes and Noble. Why? Because I can. Because I'm a free spirit. NO ONE CAN TIE ME DOWN, DAMNIT! MUAHAHAHA!

In retrospect, it probably wasn't that great of an idea to drive an hour and 15 minutes in the cold rain and then proceed to get lost like a mofo. And no doubt about it, I was lost like a mofo. But it was fun. I didn't find the B@N store I was looking for, but I found Borders, and I got to buy the new John Grisham book, plus a Jennifer Crusie book I've never even heard of. John Grisham + Jennifer Crusie make Lizzie very happy.

The highlight of the trip was totally hearing "All I wanna do is make love to you" by Heart (Thanks for those who told me it's not Roxette. My bad.). I was so excited about the part that goes "Please! Please! Understand! I'm in love! With another man!" Oh man, I was just one happy girl at that moment.

I am happy right now. I think now that I'm actually having my friggin period and all that toxic PMS crap is out of my system, I can go back to being a normal person. It's been 3 1/2 months and I think it's starting to get better now. I think things are calming down, coming back into perspective, blah blah blah. I feel genuinly happy at this moment even though I have no job or friends in Austin and my ex-boyfriend is in a relationship with someone else. Hey, good times, right? Good times.

Speaking of good times, I told him I was coming back to Dallas next weekend and he's all like, "Don't surprise me on Valentine's Day." Like I'm going to show up at his door with a dozen flowers or something. Lordy.

I had two temp agency interviews today. Tomorrow I'm gonna go try the world of retail. I just need something to fulfill myself. I feel happy right now and I like to think about how happy I'll be once I have something to do. This driving around until I can't take it anymore thing is a bit preposterous, as I gassed up today and now am already down to half a tank. That's expensive, yo.

Man, cramps really suck. They suck ass. But I never take anything for them because I kinda like having them around. I kinda like being reminded that I am woman, that I can bear children, that I have a vagina that is capable of spewing blood.

Now that I've given you all that vision, please have a lovely night.